|Book Em, Dano! Book Em, Dano! Book Em, Dano! Book Em, Dano! Book Em, Dano!
|SEE THE SUMMIT
MEETING TO DETERMINE
HAPPENED BETWEEN 24
NOVEMBER AND 26
MORE OR LESS.
|Discordian Division of the Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
|The “Book Em, Dano” Issue
|Discordian Division of the Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
ATTACK OF THE AGENTS OF GREYFACE--OR THE ELPPIN?
For those who count days, you may notice that the October Snooze Letter never arrived. Well, we wrote
it but didn't send it because we weren't able to access the controls for our website and our Ek-sen-trik
Discordian email, including our address list! We still don't know what happened, whether it was
deliberate sabotage (Greyfaces) or a supposed joke (Elppin) or just a SNAFU (either of the above). We
wish we knew, so we could throw the book at them! In any case, it took us well over two weeks to get it
straightened out. So this is the October/November 2006 issue. There may be a very short November
issue, which will have lots of really cool stuff for you to consider.
While this may be old news to many of you, for those who don't check the astronomical reports, know
that Planet X aka Planet Xena (which along with Pluto and Ceres was declared a "dwarf planet") has
been named Planet Eris after our Goddess! The actual name is 136199 Eris or some such, and the
moon has been named Dysmonia, after Eris' daughter. Of course we know the moon's real name is
Shamlicht. Prince Mu-Chao had started a "Jake campaign" to get the planet named Eris or Discordia,
and the campaign actually worked! Of course the scientist-types won't credit us Discordians, but that's
OK. We won't credit them, either.
NEW MINISTERS OF DEVIANT ART
We appreciate everyone who applied or sent us comments and recommendations on our need for an
Art Editor, and even appreciate those who didn't apply. But we have chosen our new Ministers of
Deviant Art: these are Princess Unicornia and, yes, Reverend Loveshade. While neither one
claims to be an artist, Unicornia was arts editor for a school yearbook, has collected art and done layout
for websites, and has already been instrumental in contacting some prominent artists. Uncornia is also
one of the most prolific contributors to our book. And Loveshade couldn't let the position go completely
to someone else because e's a control freak. Oh wait, we didn't say that. Congrats!
The Rescue Committee's report on Vice President Puk Cuf the Backwards, who was lost in a motel
swimming pool on August 27 (or November 26, we forget) during our Summit Meeting Fish Slapping
competition, has been delayed due to inclement weather. But they promise to have a full report by next
month on their plans for a rescue. (Note to the concerned correspondent who wishes to remain
anonymous: don't worry, this is a joke).
Nurse Devine Stripling, who ministered to Reverend Loveshade during es stay in hospital, sent us
a letter. The nurse demanded to be removed as a member and as our Minister of Sponge Baths, and
insists in no way whatsoever does e want to be considered to be a Divinely Reverend Object of
Obscene Lust! But we know our nurse is just shy. (Note to future concerned correspondents: the
real nurse, whose name is just slightly different, finds this whole thing "a kick in the ass.")
ROBERT ANTON WILSON
On a serious medical note, Robert Anton Wilson, co-author with Robert Shea of The Illuminatus!
Trilogy which popularized Discordianism, may not be long here on Planet Earth. RAW was running very
low on funds, and es desire to spend es last days at home were threatened as e was running out of
money. But Discordians and other RAW fans showed that they were more than just silly people causing
trouble, and contributed, at last count, $80,000! Bob and es daughter each posted a touching letter
thanking those who helped (and Bob made a dig about U.S. President George W. Bush to boot). We
like to think that our missing space-traveling friend BloodStar will return to take RAW home to Planet
Eris, where we hope to go when we leave this little blue-green mudball planet. We love you, Bob!
We posted a fascinating encyclopedia article on the estorical Minnie Rae, whom Emperor Norton I
declared "The Little Countess," and whom the Mythics of Harmonia declared a Discordian saint.
Minnie Rae was a reincarnation-believing "soiled dove" who worked happily in 19th century San
Francisco, California. We also posted the September 2006 Snooze Letter (this here
October/November 2006 Snooze Letter is up now or you wouldn't ge reading this here), and also a
page on the newly-named Planet Eris. Plus a page on the Elppin (from A Fnordian Bestiary by Chao
tse-Tung as translated into "modren Anglish" in the 14th century CE by Sir Jacques of the
Unhealing Wound) who have caused us so much trouble.
Yes, there's stuff we've been promising to add to the site "soon" for over a month that we still haven't
added. We've been spending most of our time working on the book, when we weren't trying to get
access to our site! We've done a preliminary layout for almost all the completed writings for
Ek-sen-trik-kuh Discordia: The Tales of Shamlicht!
This includes pieces we hope to have on the site within a month or so: "Inheritance Scam" by
Anonymous; "The Sacred Bowel Movement" by Dr. Sinister Craven; "Illuminati Chess" by
Reverend Loveshade; "Smagmoid Anagrams" by Brother Kob; an expanded “Six-Legged Sex
and Violence” by Dr. Sinister Craven; and finally the results of our Summit Meeting to determine
World Rulership (which will likely only appear on the site). And several pieces on the site are being
revised. We still hope to complete the first draft of the written portion of our holy book by the end of
2006/3172, which is keeping us busy. But we have lots of room for fillers and art, art, art!
While we have all the Discordian Haiku we need for the E.D.:TToS, you're still free to submit your poems
for our site. A Discordian Haiku consists of three lines of five, 23, and five syllables. “It is traditional for
the haiku to follow the pattern of ‘statement, violent outburst, statement’ or a voice rallying against
mediocrity which is quickly silenced.” You can see John Wilkes Harvey Oswald complete description
of it at http://community.livejournal.com/discord_society/68106.html
Speaking of Emperor Norton I, Rev DrJon Swabey, compiler of Apocrypha Discordia, has proposed
October 12/ 66 Bureaucracy as Habeas Corpus Rememberance Day. It was on this date that Norton
"dissolved" the U.S. government because it failed to live up to its own constitution and standards.
Habeas corpus ad subjiciendum is a writ enquiring into the legality of detaining a prisoner with the intent
of getting the prisoner released, often on bail. This centuries-old multinational procedure was
suspended for "terrorist suspects" by America's current Bush Administration, and is threatened in other
nations as well.
Discordians for Jesus proposed Jake Day Jr. and the Mythics of Harmonia proposed Day of the
Elppin, both as holydays for May 23/ 70 Discord. We've combined the proposals as a holiday for small
Jakes and practical jokes, especially those which cause embarrassment and the loss of personal
modesty, which is typical of the Elppin. (We think the Elppin are responsible for Janet Jackson's
breast being exposed during the Super Bowl).
Razmear, one of the husbands of Saint The Mary, proposed Planet Eris Day for September 14/ 38
Bureaucracy, because that was the date that the naming of the planet by People Who Are Astronomers,
or whatever they're called, became commonly known. We've tweaked the proposal a bit as Mass of
Planet Eris to be celebrated on September 13/ 37 Bureaucracy, which is the date the announcement
was actually made. We hope Razmear doesn't mind.
Let us know what you think of the above holyday proposals by sending us an email by November 30 to
our address listed below. As of this moment, we are no longer looking for proposed holydays--we can
barely fit what we have in our book!
(Details can be found at discordia.loveshade.org/ek-sen-trik-kuh/holydays)
October 24 (5 Aftermath): Maladay (PD)
November 16 (28 Aftermath): Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild Day (ECG)
November 25 (37 Aftermath): 537 Day (ED), sometimes Turkey Day (O)
December 8 (50 Aftermath): Afflux (PD)
December 25 (67 Aftermath): Santa Claus Day (O)/(DD)
December 30 (72 Aftermath): New Year's Eve Eve (ECG)
WHAT'S BEEN ACCEPTED FOR THE BOOK?
Thanks to those who expressed their opinions on “Five Basic Beliefs” and the revised “Who the Hell
is E?” by Reverend Loveshade; and “Pussy Fun” from The Smagmoid Kids Club Handbook. They
all received support, and will be included in Ek-sen-trk-kuh Discordia: The Tales of Shamlicht.
Congrats to the authors!
STUFF TO CONSIDER
We'll be sending out submissions for you to consider for our book at the end of November or beginning
of December, so look for them!
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