Ignore the fnords

Discordian Division of the Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
Snooze Letter

December 2010

The Nude Pineapple Issue


This being The Nude Pineapple Issue, in which we remind you of nominations for the Order of the Pineapple,
enlighten you on progress on everyone's favorite as-of-yet-unpublished-book Ek-sen-trik-kuh Discordia: The
Tales of Shamlicht and how you could win money, tell you about the newest favorite Discordian book that
appeared in December 2010  called Et Cetera Discordia, announce the return of our old lost website, push
free Discordian calendars, and invite you to a nude Discordian wedding.


It’s been a year since we announced the engagement of D & D of the ECG member Labial Dentist and then
new member
Mistress Cockroach Bouncer (now usually called Mistress C.B.). They’ve been engaged
for a year, but agreed to disengage long enough to get married. They had planned a small private
Discordian ceremony, but plans get changed, and this time for the better. It will now be a slightly larger
private Discordian ceremony and you are invited!

The hippie–happy–couple have decided to open up to Discordians in the area when they get married at
midnight UTC on Nude Year’s Eve/New Year’s Eve as 2010 becomes 2011. The nuptials will actually start
about 23:00 hrs. UTC on New Year’s Eve, but the party will start earlier. Greyface says you have to have the
party after the wedding, but so what?

Reverend Loveshade is scheduled to perform the ceremony assuming e can prove e's legally qualified to
do so.  If not, e will still perform the ceremony even if someone else has to sign the officious documents. And
we hope to have at least one member of the
Mythics of Harmonia in attendance.

If you have no plans and you’re going to be in or near
Wotton-under-Edge in the Stroud District of
Gloucestershire, England, you might want to come. So if you're skipping the pub this year and would like to
attend a Discordian wedding where neither eating mince pie nor wearing clothes is required (you can eat
mince pie and wear clothing if you want to, or visa versa), send an 'I'd like to come' note to the temporary
email (
email discontinued after wedding).


Back in the day when pterodactyls ruled the Earth, The Loveshade Family possessed the website loveshade.
com.  Then when The Agents of Greyface went after some of us in a very serious way, we lost it and
someone else got it on 9 September 2002 (Discordians might recognize that as
Cat Dancing & Foot Fetish
Day).  You might know dot com domain names can usually be registered for between $10 and $30 per year
in American money.  But at first the domain was not for sale, period.  Then as we developed
loveshade.org, it was for sale--at $500!  We didn't buy it, loveshade.org became one of the one percent most
popular websites in the world, and then the minimum opening bid, not buying price, for loveshade.com was
$1200!  Sometimes popularity is costly.  We even more didn't buy it.

But with a little help from some friends (and just a touch of skull drudgery), we got it back!  Right now go to
loveshade.com and it will take you directly to loveshade.org.  We couldn't be happier than if we'd won the
National Lottery!  Well, all right, that would have made us happier.  But still, we're grinning like the cat that
ate the annoying hamster!


The book Ek-sen-trik-kuh Discordia: The Tales of Shamlicht is still gallantly holding onto being nearly
finished.  It's not easy putting a complex book together with dozens of contributors when your glorious leader
has ADHD!  We are still looking for Book Reviewers before we do the final draft, so if you're interested send
us an email to the address listed or linked at the bottom of this here letter.

Good News for Contributors

If you contributed at least half a page to this doing-it-completely-for-free project, you might actually get some
money!  We received a nice donation from an Anonymous Lifeform.  The money is great, but not enough to
divide among the dozens of contributors.  So if you're interested in being considered for the random drawing,
do the following:

1) Send us an email reminding us of what you contributed to the address listed or linked below by midnight
UTC between 17 and 18 January 2011.  Your contributions have to total half a page or more, but we'll add
everything together.  Thus a quarter page here and a third of a page there count as half a page (we'll round

2) For each half page you contributed, you receive 1 chance to win.  So if your total contribution is 4 1/2
pages (rounded down), that's 9 chances to win.

3) Wait for Hug Day, 21 January 2010.  We'll have a
Respected Neutral Party randomly determine two
winners.  The two winners will split the money!  If one person would win both, we'll redo the second number.

Yes, those who contributed more have a better chance of winning, but don't be discouraged if you gave half
a page.  Everyone who enters has at least one chance!

Free Email Address

In addition to the above, all contributors can receive a free email address!  Why should you care when there
are so many free emails out there?  Because this is one you can individualize.  Fat chance getting george or
martha at yahoo/hotmail/lycos/gmail etc.  But your name at loveshade dot org is probably available.  We may
have some emails left over for others--if you're interested, let us know.  Send us an email to the address
listed or linked below and tell us what name you'd like.


Professor Cramulus announces:

In 1958 or 1959 (we’re not sure which), Eris, the Goddess of Confusion, sent an Emperor Penguin to a
bowling alley in California. It appeared before
Malaclypse the Younger and Lord Omar Khayyam
and inspired them to create the Discordian Society: a tribe of philosophers, theologians,
magicians, scientists, artists, clowns, and similar maniacs.

Et Cetera Discordia proudly celebrates 50th the anniversary of this prophetic vision. It is a collage of
the funny, weird, and often profound writings and art created by numerous modern (and post-modern)
Discordians. This book is an invitation to join them in exploring, celebrating, and remixing this strange and
exciting century.

A bit of background:
Triple Zero and I had this idea back in 2008. The original idea was to create a quick
one-shot internet forum which gathered content for quick publication of a new Discordian text celebrating
Discordia’s 50th anniversary. So we threw THE PARTY AT LIMBO PEAK, an intentionally short-lived Internet
forum, where people could post anonymously and then later unmask themselves at the end of the party. The
project got out of control and we took a million years to finish it. And the finished product is a beautiful 128
page paperback, the latest addition to Grand and Glory Old Discordjia!

The Etc. Discordia can be purchased in paperback or downloaded for free in PDF form here.

Reverend Loveshade adds:

Discordian Cyberspace Masquerade (aka TPALP) led to several very cool and enlightening things and, as
fits modern-day Discordians, some not-so-cool-nor-enlightening things.  To me the best part of the forum
was being able to post without people either saying, 'I just love Reverend Loveshade whatever Revy Love
says is totally awesome' or 'That's that sicko Reverend Loveshade where's my AK-47 let's kill the Evil
Bastard!'  The Party led to both
Day of Discord and ShamliCon, and now to this book.  It includes some great
stuff; some crap; bits by our members and associates including myself,
Anonymous Lifeform (under a
different name, natch), and
Princess Unicornia (aka Lorien Loveshade); plus the obligatory Reverend
Loveshade insult on the bottom of page 80.  For some background, check out http://discordia.loveshade.


Yes, there's still time to make a nomination or suggestion thereof for the Order of the Pineapple!  The OP,
sometimes called the DisOrder of the Pineapple, began on 18 January 1982 to honor service to the original
Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild.  The facts that date is
Robert Anton Wilson's birthday, one of the original ECG
members was friends with RAW's daughter
Luna Wilson, and RAW emself was later named to the Order is
strictly synchronicity.  The award has been given by three different disorganizations including the original
ECG, Earth Chapter Five of the Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild, and the Discordian Division of the Ek-sen-
triks CluborGuild

While a direct or indirect contribution to D & D of the ECG or the ECG is technically required, we're pretty
loose with rules around here.  But exceptional service to the cause of discord and eccentric tendencies is still
a must. While only a member of the DisOrder can technically make a nomination, we'll take suggestions for
deserving trouble-makers from anyone.

Please send them no later than Santa Claus Day (25 December 2010).  The Winner or Winners (in the past
few years we've had two) will be announced on Pat Pineapple Day, 18 January 2011.  Send your suggestions
including reasons why we should consider your proposed member to (
email nominations are over). This is a
temporary email addy that will be discontinued after the winner/winners is/are announced.  

And remember to consume something made of or resembling pineapple on that day.  While anyone's
welcome to do so, that's an absolute and essential requirement of OP members.  Unless of course they don't
feel like it.

CALENDAR FOR 2011/3177

It's not too late to get your choice of five Discordian calendars for free!  Check out these cool can-be-printed-
to-be-hung-on-your-prison-cell-wall calendars at
Thanks to the other anonymous for providing this and for including a number of our Ek-sen-trik Discordian


(See a list of all our holydays with a link to full descriptions, including what ED and MH and PD and such
stand for, at

December 4 (46 Aftermath):
Hug Day II (O)
December 8 (50 Aftermath):
Afflux (PD)
December 25 (67 Aftermath):
Santa Claus Day (O)/(ED)
December 30 (72 Aftermath):
New Year's Eve Eve (ECG)

January 1 (1 Chaos):
New Year's Day (O)/Nude Year's Day (MH)
January 5 (5 Chaos):
Mungday (PD)
January 10 (10 Chaos):
Backwards Day, Reformed (O)/(ED)
January 10 (10 Chaos):
Binary Day (ED)
January 18 (18 Chaos):
Pat Pineapple Day (ECG)
January 21 (21 Chaos):
Hug Day (O)
January 26 (26 Chaos):
Backwards Day, Traditional (O)

February 18 (49 Chaos):
The Mary Day (ED)
February 19 (50 Chaos):
Chaosflux (PD)
February 20 (51 Chaos):
Pet Loving Day (O)
February 29 (St. Tib's Day):
St. Tib's Day (PD)/Leaping Birth Day (ED)
February 30 (?????):
The Unknown Holyday
March 10 (69 Chaos): Head Chicken/Chicken Head Day (MH)

March 19 (5 Discord):
Mojoday (PD) or Lingananday
March 25 (11 Discord): Discordians for Jesus/Neighbor Loving Day (DJ)

April 1 (18 Discord):
April Fool's Day (O)
April 2 (19 Discord):
St John the Blasphemist's Day (ED)
April 6 (23 Discord):
Jake Day (O)


Look for: exciting follow-ups and additions, update on the planet named after our Goddess Eris/Discordia,
how to prepare a pineapple-stuffed llama, and a Discordian dating site.

Note to Alert Readers who noticed we had this same Coming Next Issue in last issue--December doesn't


You can visit our small but selective store at discordia.loveshade.org/store. Remember, a portion of your
purchase through our store can help keep our site up and help pay off our legal fees--but it costs you
nothing more and you can get discounts through us! And if you don't want to buy anything from us, you can
sponsor a page on our site including our main page, or simply give us money. See Why Should I Donate? at
discordia.loveshade.org/xtra/donate.html, or let us know if you'd like to sponsor a page or our site by sending
an email to the address listed on our

* * * * *

If you or someone you know wants to begin getting our absolutely free Snooze Letter and other cool
emailings (we usually send about one email a month), send an email to the address listed on our
with the subject
Add Me. If you want us to take your name off of our emailing list (which means you will
remain unilluminated), send an email to the same address with the subject

Send your comments on our Snooze Letter or proposals or opinions on submitted pieces or a request to
review future submissions or your birthday suit day or your vote on proposed saints or anything else other
than submissions to the same address, but put something Discordian (ED, ECG, Eris, etc.) in your heading
so we'll know it's not spam. (We get a lot of spam, and don't want to unknowingly delete something from a

Nominations or info on the Order of the Pineapple may be sent to the email address listed at

If you want to make a submission for our website or possible future projects, email it to the address listed for
submssions at our
homepage. Please see submission details at discordia.loveshade.org/xtra/xssubmit.html
before you submit. Thank you and have a day.
A Snooze Letter of
the Discordian Division of the Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
The Sims belongs to Electronic Arts.  The rest of
the work is licensed under a
Creative Commons
2.5 License.
Discordia Home     Xtra Stuff
Snooze Letters
We made the wondrous textured wallpaper, but if
you really want to use it, go for it--we made it
public domain (kopyleft).
Discordian Division of the
Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
Snooze Letter
December 2010
Original characters by The Loveshade Family
made with The Sims 2.  No threat to any
copyright of Electronic Arts which makes The
Sims franchise is intended.
Symbol of The Loveshade Family
that stands for something
important.  We guess.
Discordian Division of the
Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
Symbol of The Loveshade Family
Winners and how they
were selected are
described at the
bottom of this here
We have our winners in the Ek-sen-trik-kuh Discordia: The Tales of Shamlicht contributors contest.

And the winners are...

Fairy Princess Yoshikyoko and Reverend Loveshade.

This is how the winners were determined in five steps, naturally:

1) Public notice was given for everyone who contributed to
ED:TToS to contact the Ek-sen-trik Discordians.  
Unfortunately, we don't have contact information for everyone who contributed, so this way everyone had a
chance to contact us.  Notice was included in the December
Ek-sen-trik Discordian Snooze Letter; linked in
December on our
homepage; posted in December on our website at
discordia.loveshade.org/xtra/snooze/snooze1012.html; posted in early January at the 23 Apples of Eris at
23ae.com/2011/01/ek-sen-trik-kuh-discordia-the-tales-of-shamlicht-update-january-2011, and sent again to
everyone who subscribes to the Snooze Letter in mid January.

2) We compiled the list of contributions who responded, and rounded each person's contributions down to
the nearest half page (less than half a page counted as zero, but that wasn't a problem as no one who
contributed less than half a page responded).  Each half page gave one chance to win; for example,
contributing half a page gave 1 chance; 40 pages gave 80 chances.  Thus those who contributed more had
a better chance in the random drawing.

3) To insure contributors would know the two winners were determined randomly, we had two volunteers who
were not included in the drawing.  Professor Mu-Chao made two random determinations.  Mu-Chao had a list
of numbers and corresponding letters (contributor A, B, C, D, E, etc.) but no names.  So while Mu-Chao's
random rolls determined the winners, Mu-Chao did not know who the two winners were.

4) Mu-Chao then sent the two letters to Professor Cramulus.  Cramulus had a list that showed which person
each letter corresponded to.  Cramulus checked the list, then made the official announcement by sending it
to the Ek-sen-trik Discordians.

5) The Ek-sen-trik Discordians announced the winners to the public.
announced below