|Ignore the fnords
Discordian Division of the Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
April - May 2011
The Discordian American Princess Issue
This being The Discordian American Princess Issue in which we cook a DAP for nine months, try to convince
a DAP to graduate college almost naked, reveal that there is such a thing as a virgin DAP, annouce a church
for DAPs, give a DAP update on our still-not-here-yet book, give you some cool DAP links, kiss a DAP, and
announce a new book for DAPs and the Discordians who love them.
VOICES OF CHAOS
Sometimes, it seems there are so many Discordian books out there that they're a dime a dozen. Well, now
there's one that's $23.23!
We haven't yet seen this book, but we can assure you this is one you'll want to check out. Timothy Bowen
brings us interviews with some of the most influencial Discordians who aren't already dead. It features Rev.
Ivan Stang (co-author of The Book of the Subgenius), Adam Gorightly (author of The Prankster and the
Conspiracy: The Story of Kerry Thornley and How He Met Oswald and Inspired the Counterculture), Rev.
Dr. Jon Swabey (Discordian historian and editor of Apocrypha Discordia), Rev. St. Syn KSC (publisher of
the hardback Principia Discordia and many Discordian works), and several others including, ahem,
Reverend Loveshade (Ek-sen-trik-kuh Discordia: The Tales of Shamlicht).
Check it out at www.lulu.com/product/paperback/voices-of-chaos/15593306
By the way, most of these books can be purchased through our Store (we promise we'll finally expand it).
I KISSED A DISCORDIAN AMERICAN PRINCESS
(AND I LIKED IT)
The good folk at Uncyclopedia featured another article about a Discordian American Princess! This time
DAP Katy Perry was featured on the front page on 3 April 2011. If you don't know, Perry was raised in a
very conservative Christian home by two evangelists where they refused to have "deviled eggs" or the "Dirt
Devil" vaccuum cleaner and was sent to Christian school. She was made to listen only to Christian music,
and her first album was gospel music.
The result? She's done very controverial music including "I Kissed a Girl" and "Ur So Gay," posed nude, and
got married in a Hindu wedding. Sounds like a DAP to us!
See the article at http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Katy_Perry and see Uncyclopedia's list of Discordian
American Princesses at the bottom of that page.
DAP TO GRADUATE NAKED?
Princess Unicornia, who looks an awful lot like Lorien Loveshade, is scheduled to graduate from college
with a bachelor's degree in June! Unicornia attends college with sister DAP Fairy Princess Yoshikyoko.
Unicornia wants to teach elementary school. I wonder how parents will react to that. Would you want a DAP
teaching your kids? We sure would! Congradulations!
By the way, we're not supposed to say that Yoshikyoko, one of two winners with Reverend Loveshade in
our semi-random drawing based on number of pages contributed to the EDTTOS, plans to use part of es
winnings to buy a graduation present for Unicornia. So we won't.
We're also not supposed to say that friends of the nudist Unicornia are trying to convince em to graduate
wearing nothing but cap, gown, and shoes. If you'd like to encourage or congratulate Unicornia, send an
email to unicornia [at] loveshade [dot] org. Upskirt cam not guaranteed.
Yes, Virginia, they do exist. The aforementioned Unicornia (23) and Yoshikyoko (19), along with Miley
Spears who just reached legal age for parts of the United States and most of the United Kingdom (16), claim
to be virgins. There's no particular reason for this entry other than to prove it is possible. No prurient
interest is intended. Would we lie?
To change the subject, congrats to Miley on getting a driver's license! If you see Miley behind the wheel, you
are not required to dive into the nearest ditch. Just smile. Or, better yet, flash the 23 or 537 sign, but not
both. Keep one hand on the wheel.
NOT SO VIRGIN DAP
aka DAP IN THE OVEN
(I'm not coming out!)
Sometimes you just can't until the birthday to discover what your present is. Well, Ms. Candy Monkey aka
Olivia and Father Loveshade aka Reverend Loveshade couldn't resist a peek in the package.
The baby Olivia is anxious to introduce to the world and kick out of its increasingly crowded bed womb is a
human! Bet you were surprised, considering our bet is Reverend Loveshade is the father. Also the baby
has a vagina. Or in more politically correct terms, it's a girl. As at least one of es parents is an American
citizen (we aren't sure which one), even though the girl is likely to be born in the United Kingdom, she can still
run for president. Provided e has a birth certificate.
If all goes according to schedule, look for a very special announcement in our next Snooze Letter.
TOKEN NOT DAP
Alden Loveshade hates getting mentioned in our Snooze Letters. Alden refuses to admit being a
Discordian let alone a Discordian American Princess (in politically correct terms, e is severly vaginally
challenged. That is, closer to a prince than a princess. You know, has a penis?).
But Alden got Discordianism mentioned in an article on Yahoo! See Christian Genocide at
www.associatedcontent.com/article/7742610/christian_genocide.html?cat=34 and click on Alden's name
there for more articles. Also check out Alden's first story selected as official for Yahoo! News at
me_court. It's about Sex Discrimination and Wal-Mart, both of which are frequently experienced by DAPS.
See how we tied that in?
Alden and a couple other Discordians are planning to attend the Texas Pirate Festival at Middlefaire near
Hillsboro, Texas on Saturday, 7 May 2011. Alden's writing an article on the event for Yahoo, so look for a
man taking photos and asking questions. Maybe we can convince em to hand out Pirate Pass-Off cards (see
http://23ae.com/2010/03/pirate-pass-off). You can email Alden by finding es email address at
EK-SEN-TRIK-KUH DISCORDIA: THE TALES OF SHAMLICHT DAP UPDATE
It's not over til it's over. The book which features over 150 pages of great stuff including Discordian
American Princesses (and several more of utter crap) is being reviewed by, well, its reviewers. Based on
suggestions, we're doing some small rewrites, redoing a few images, and increasing the resolution of images
we already have (who knew even small, simple black and white graphics should be saved in 300 pixels per
inch for printing).
Next step may be simultaneous: looking for someone to write the introduction and looking for a publisher.
Thank Goddess it looks like we have enough appropriate quotes by Robert Anton Wilson to make em a
semi co-writer of our introduction. RAW aka Grandbob is the father of Christina Pearson aka Princess
Trichster and of the Matron Saint of DAPS Luna Wilson. Grandbob saw an early version of the book, and
was kind enough to make some wonderfully-stated and actually positive comments about the book. Of
course we'll include some quotes by people who hate us. After all, we want to be as "fair and balanced" as
Fox News, don't we?
FREE DAP EMAIL
Free email addresses are still available! Are you a DAP? Did you contribute something to the book? Want
bob or sue or another name that's already taken at virtually every email service in existence? Well, now you
can! Your name at loveshade [dot] org is probably available. We may have some emails left over for
others--if you're interested, let us know. Send us an email to the address listed or linked below and tell us
what name you'd like.
CHURCH FOR DAPS
The First Baptist Church of Janustown, Texas has come. Sort of. More accurately, it's coming. Right
now it's a little new stuff with links to cool already-there stuff. See what's there so far at
MISS A DAPPY SNOOZE LETTER?
You can always catch up by going to discordia.loveshade.org/xtra/snooze/index.html. We do sometimes
have special bits in the emailed Snooze Letters that do not appear online, so feel free to subscribe! (Details
DAP Miley Spears is planning to have links to major DAP sites soon at mileyspears.com/dap
APRIL THROUGH AUGUST DAP HOLYDAYS
(See a list of all our holydays with a link to full descriptions, including what ED and MH and PD and such
stand for, at discordia.loveshade.org/ek-sen-trik-kuh/holydays)
April 1 (18 Discord): April Fool's Day (O)
April 2 (19 Discord): St John the Blasphemist's Day (ED)
April 6 (23 Discord): Jake Day (O)
May 3 (50 Discord): Discoflux (PD)
May 23 (70 Discord): Jake Day Jr. (DJ)/Day of the Elppin (MH)
May 25 (72 Discord): Towel Day (O)
May 31 (5 Confusion): Syaday (PD) or Gulikday/Fearless Fred Day (ED)
May 37 (11 Confusion): 537 Day (ECG)
June 10 (15 Confusion): Mad Hatter Day (O)
June 21 (26 Confusion): Imaginary Friend/Captain Tuttle Day (ED)/(MH)
July 2 (37 Confusion): Mid-Year's Day (ECG)
July 15 (50 Confusion): Confuflux (PD)
August 10 (3 Bureaucracy): Multiversal Underwear Day (O)/(MH)
August 12 (5 Bureaucracy): Zaraday (PD)
August 25 (18 Bureaucracy): Festival of Hanky-Panky Spankies (MH)
Special: Go Topless Protest Day August 21 (see naked.info)
SHOPPING FOR MOM, DAD, DAP, OR GRAD?
You can visit our small but selective store at discordia.loveshade.org/store. Remember, a portion of your
purchase through our store can help keep our site up and help pay off our legal fees--but it costs you
nothing more and you can get discounts through us! And if you don't want to buy anything from us, you can
sponsor a page on our site including our main page, or simply give us money. See Why Should I Donate? at
discordia.loveshade.org/xtra/donate.html, or let us know if you'd like to sponsor a page or our site by sending
an email to the address listed on our homepage.
OSAMA BIN LADEN IS NOT A DISCORDIAN AMERICAN PRINCESS
Also e's dead.
* * * * *
If you or someone you know wants to begin getting our absolutely free Snooze Letter and other cool
emailings (we usually send about one email a month), send an email to the address listed on our homepage
with the subject Add Me. If you want us to take your name off of our emailing list (which means you will
remain unilluminated), send an email to the same address with the subject Unsubscribe.
Send your comments on our Snooze Letter or proposals or opinions on submitted pieces or a request to
review future submissions or anything else other than submissions to the same address, but put something
Discordian (ED, ECG, Eris, etc.) in your heading so we'll know it's not spam. (We get a lot of spam, and don't
want to unknowingly delete something from a Discordian).
If you want to make a submission for our website or possible future projects, email it to ed_submit
[at]loveshade [dot] org. Please see submission details at discordia.loveshade.org/xtra/xssubmit.html before
you submit. Thank you and have a day.
|A Snooze Letter of
the Discordian Division of the Ek-sen-triks CluborGuild
|Image of Katy Perry we got from Uncyclopedia
and retains its copyright. The rest of this work is
licensed under a
|Discordian Division of the
April - May 2011
|Discordian Division of the
|I KISSED A
NAMED KATY PERRY
|VOICE OF CHAOS
Interviews with: Adam
Loveshade Chaplin IM
False, KSC Spratzaman
Rojas Peter Carroll The
Discordian Society LOB
Rev.Dr. Jon Swabey
BOB001 Rev. Ivan Stang
Rev. St. Syn KSC
JHESFC and Beatus
recognized by Yahoo!
|Email for DAPs
Church for DAPs
|NAKED DAPS AND